The letters of our thoughts are the ideas present in our mind before they come to realization . . . Thoughts that are, yet not felt . . . The words of the subconscious . . . of the soul . . .

These are the LETTERS OF MY THOUGHTS.

Friday, October 20, 2006

Celebrating One Year of Polish Cleaning Ladies and Kurczaki!

It's hard to believe that it's been one year since my fateful trip to Poland . . . (In truth, Shabbos is the anniversary, but since I can't post on Shabbos . . .)
To think, a blog built on Polish jokes and photos has grown to be . . . a blog that, uh . . . well . . . Celebrates the anniversary of telling Polish jokes . . .
In honor of this gala event, I've found a delightlul article by Dorota (The most common ladies name in Poland, at least four of our cleaning ladies were Dorota) Brzozowska (Pronounced Bshozovska -don't ask) concerning Polish Jokes about Americans.
It has such classics as:

The head shepherd came to America and robbed a bank. He hides in a roadside ditch, takes
of the sack and starts counting. Suddenly he sees a uniformed official who shows him a badge
"POLICE".
And the head shepherd says: - No, thanks for your help, mister. I can count it myself.
untranslatable wordplay: "POLICE" in the Polish mountain dialect means "I will count".]
But I don't want to spoil the fun . . .

Better yet, I've gone ahead and collected my ALL TIME BEST Polish Joke Posts!
Yes, the very best of the Blog that put such terms as "Dzein Dobry", "Kurczaki", and "Why am I in Poland again?" in the J-Blogosphere's lexicon!
That's right, for the limited time that I'm able to keep your attention, and your finger away from the Go Back button on your browser, you'll get pięć classic Polish jokes . . . yes that's p-i-ę-ć 'Pinch', five, Classic Jokes.
So act now!
Take a trip down memory lane with

  • Welcome to Ulica Slominskiego 19

or
POLISH HAIR (and I don't mean a Polski version of the famous play about hippies)

Welcome to Warszawa . . . Oh, you thought that you were in Warsaw . . . Nope . . . here we like adding lots of letters to make things hard to pronounce (as opposed to Quebec, where they put in lots of letters that they DON'T pronounce like Mo-re-al (spelled Montreal for some strange raison (that's French for reason))

Here an Ł is a W, a W is a V, and V altogether doesn’t exist . . .

And people wonder why they make Pollack jokes . . . HA!
>> Continue Polish Hair

  • How to tell a Joke in Polish

In America we make Polak jokes. I think that in Poland, they must make Cleaning Lady jokes.


Joke in America
A blind man walks into a bar. He sits down, buys a drink, then leans over to a person near him and says,
"Would you like to hear a joke? There once was a Polak . . . ."
"One second," interrupts the bar tender. "My name is Renik Papke -I'm 6 foot, 9. I have a black belt in Karate. To your left is sitting Jana Pawła Ulicowski, and to your right is Vładisłav Warszawski . . . The three of us are Polish -are you sure you want to continue that joke?"
"Nah," says the blind man, "I don't feel like explaining it three times."

Here's the same joke in Poland
A blind man walks into a bar. He sits down, buys a drink, then leans over to a person near him and says,
"Would you like to hear a joke? There once was a Cleaning Lady . . ."
"One second," interrupts the bar tender. "My name is Renik Papke -I'm 6 foot, 9. I have a black belt in Karate. To your left is sitting Jana Pawła Ulicowski, and to your right is Vładisłav Warszawski . . . the three of us have sisters who are cleaning ladies -are you sure you want to continue that joke?"
"Hah," says the blind man, "You think that's bad, I married one!"
>> Continue Polish Cleaning Lady Jokes
  • On the Polish Side of Things

My experience ordering a taxi . . .

Time: 3:00 A.M.
Place: Słomenskiego 17


Our hero, Mottel, picks up the phone a precedes to dial . . .
Dispatcher: Dzein Dobry! (Good day!)
Mottel (to himself): Isn't it still night . . .?
Dispatcher: Co? (What?)
Mottel: Nothing . . . Do you speak English?
Dispatcher: No, I'm sorry, but I am not proficient in the English language . . . please wait while I transfer you to an English speaking colleague.
Bad Polish rock music plays for a few minutes while on hold . . .
>>
To Continue on the Polish Side of Things


Yes, there is more my dear Kurczaki . . .
Don't forget:



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5 comments:

Anonymous said...

Not only I'm polish, but my BOTH parents were born in chelm....Are you sure you want to continue this joke? lol

Mottel said...

I figured that most Poles wouldn't get it anyway . . .
How's my Polish though?
;-)

Anonymous said...

i guess the jewish part of me got them then :))
i'm very impressed, even your spelling is pretty good.
na zdrowie!(figure that one out!)
;))

Mottel said...

L'chaim.
It's because I use an online translator!

Anonymous said...

cheater!
:)) I meant it more as congrats, it could meant a lot of stuff!