The letters of our thoughts are the ideas present in our mind before they come to realization . . . Thoughts that are, yet not felt . . . The words of the subconscious . . . of the soul . . .


Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Revenge of the Don't Read the Fine Print

It's been a while since I've done one of these . . . and after scratching my head over what to write I figured it was time to bring back some of my old sections.

Some background (for those of you who weren't around back then):

Back in Lithuania I was munching on a box of "Sugar Free Egg Kichel". To my shock I saw the words:

"Use of the product may be hazardous to your health."

Printed on the side of the box. Since then I've always kept my eyes out for wacky fine print . . .

This one has been sitting in my archives since last summer, so I figure now is as good as a time as any to bring it out.

While sitting in my room in Petersburg, Russia, I noticed a bottle of some Homeopathic formula to help those wished to quit smoking.

I don't smoke, and I solute all those who wish to quit the nasty habit . . . but at some point the instructions and fine print are just strange odd.

Recommended Dosage:

. . .

Children Under 12:
. . .

. . .
Now adult cigarette addiction I understand.

Children under 12 . . . It's wacky, but I suppose it can happen (after all I did see this bottle in Russia)

But infants? Babies?

What the heck!

My friends, at times it's worth noting . . . Don't read the fine print.

For others in the series:
Don't read the fine print, Return of Don't Read the fine print, Don't Read The Fine Print -Partie Trois, and More of Don't Read the Fine Print.

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Der Shygetz said...


Reminds me the "Glatt Kosher" label on some chicken products (from a firm that also makes beef products) where the firm saves money by running part of the label specifically for one product and using the same template for all others.

Also, in these days of lawsuits, some yukel can decide to sue the firm after giving his infant 10 drops of the (possibly highly alcoholic) solution and causing temporary or permanent damage. The warning gets the firm off the hook.

Nemo said...

Shygetz: the only thing better than seeing "Glatt Kosher" on chicken is seeing it on non-Chalav Yisroel dairy products.

Der Shygetz said...


Nemo - this I have never seen but I have seen many an abuse of the term kasher lemehadrin.

Mottel said...

I'm with Nemo: Glatt Kosher Ice-cream is worse

Der Shygetz said...


How about the Badatz hechsher on bleach (and probably muriatic acid as well) in E"Y?

I used to fill up an old EY bleach jug with arak (same thing) and drink from it on Purim!

Nemo said...

It can be found in many kosher airline meals, particularly breakfast omelets with cheese

Der Shygetz said...


What can be found on airline meals? Bleach and muriatic acid? They are banned substances on planes even before 9/11.

Or is that non dairy creamer really laundry bleach which probably does turn coffee light if added to it?

Sefirah said...

well what about the kosher toilet paper I found in Canada...

and the signs of "guaranteed chickens" outside the yeshivah before kapparos....