The letters of our thoughts are the ideas present in our mind before they come to realization . . . Thoughts that are, yet not felt . . . The words of the subconscious . . . of the soul . . .


Wednesday, October 10, 2007

In The Market For a Shotgun

Another Painting by Chaim Goldberg. Of note, I wanted to use a different picture, but it was already featured in a previous post. As well, Chaim in fact hailed from Kazimierz Dolny -mentioned the other day.

I'm currently doing hashgacha in a winery . . . More on that to come.

Henei Ba Yom Hadin

Behold the Day of Judgment has arrived!

This is a post that I do not know if I should write . . . Both in regards to the sagacity of publicizing personal things on the internet, and if I truly have thought out what I want to write.

Last year I got smicha, and in the words of my dear friend Yossi after smicha comes the next step . . .

And so I get questions, nudges, jokes and hints . . .

All about getting a Shotgun. (Shotgun is a Dutch word and read with a hard t and throaty g -for in the Netherlands, a T is D and a G is Ch . . .)

Quite frankly, I'm afraid of guns, so I tell them,
'I don't believe in violence. Why do I need a shotgun?"
But they insist . . .
'Everyone needs a shotgun, and so do you.'
'But whatever for?' I ask them.
'Why to go hunting for birds! You can't hunt with out a shotgun.'
'But where do I get such a shotgun?'
'Where everyone else has a gun - Brooklyn. You'll go to the store, they'll give you a look up and down, and then you get a shotgun.'

And what will happen next? From there I can only conjecture. They'll look at me from behind the counter and the wafting clouds of cigarette smoke and say,
'You look like you'll be in the market for hunting chicken -Perhaps Cornish hen?'
'And how do you know that?'
'Oh, we know. We know.'

And so it goes on.

I'm not opposed to hunting -I'm game, as it were.
But why the violence of it all?

Note: Before forming an opinion about this post, please read more here. I can take no responsibilities for any assumptions on your part, be they true or otherwise.

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yitz.. said...

in my opinion (which i've shared on many occasions) getting married is the bravest moment of your life.. everything afterwards may be difficult at times, but it doesn't require the same courage that actually putting yourself into it in the first place requires..

(u need good friends to talk you through it constantly, especially in the beginning, when you first start dating someone you are really interested in.)


A Simple Jew said...

Happy hunting ;)

Tamara said...

I thought this was about a wife! Glad the first commentor cleared that up for me.

My feeling is, always be open, look but don't hunt. When your time comes, it will be all too clear.

Mottel said...

Who said anything about getting married or a wife . . .
I wrote about a shotgun!

chanie said... did indeed, and put in your hints here and there....and at your agem you should expect the pokes (haven't you been dealing with them since 'shemoneh esrei l'chuppa'?). shame on you for denying the connection!

and indeed i am opposed to the violence needed when using shodchuns...
and there should be no need for violence, for if something is meant for you, you need no violence to claim it 'game' or your bashert.

and dont you need a license to buy guns???
then again....vd"l.

Anonymous said...

MAzel Tov!!!

Sefirah said...


e. said...

*very* well written, *very* funny post, well, then you should be betched with...clear vision and a good shutgun, the hunt will be easy I"Y"H.

shoshana (bershad) said...

If you watched Saturday Night Live in the distant past, you may remember Gilda Radner's character, Emily Litella, who always misheard things and went on a rant about them till she was informed of her mistake.

"Oh, you meant VIOLINS, not VIOLENCE? Never mind!" :-)

Seems to fit this post!

redsneakz said...

Of course, if you act (chas v'shalom) intermperately with a girl, the shadchen might very well BE a shotgun.